This weekend I spent being a lump on a log. What does that mean exactly, for me it means binge-watching Hallmark shows. When I do this, it means a big change is on the horizon. It is my body, mind, and spirit's way of fueling up for what is coming.
It is time to start reviewing this year. Where did I start, where am I now and how far did I come? Goal setting, sigh. Not something I enjoy honestly. I am a big visionary so when I goal plan it is big, REAL BIG, things that there is no way I could even imagine seeing happen.
In September I had a goal to retire my husband by January 1st. I didn’t know how this would happen, but I knew it would. Today is December 6th and I have made a big $47 since September. Guess who is not retiring by January. So, what happened? I was out of alignment, that’s what happened.
When October hit and I hadn’t made any movement, I started to get discouraged and by November 1st I was ready to give up and I did mental. I fell back into poor habits and victim mentality. But then something happened.
Two people in the same week gave me a homework assignment that was exactly the same. These people don’t know each other at all. OK, the universe stepped in and offered me up a solution.
After doing the assignments I realized I was way out of alignment with my inspiration. For the last 11 years I have been obsessed with nutrition, but nothing I was doing focused on this. I was taking the board approach and that just doesn’t work for me. So, I narrowed down my direction. When I did this, it helped to also see how I could add my hubby to my coaching business.
I am beyond excited to announce that he is becoming a personal trainer. My two youngest kiddos who are competitive athletes will also be helping out. We will help families restore their health naturally with food, fitness, mental and emotional programs.
We are kicking things off with a private FB group and would love for you to join: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1475268589524447
As our business takes shape we will offer more and more, so join the fun now.
Sometimes in life, we are hit with so many things all at one time we feel like we are drowning, literally.
This last week was exactly how I felt. Yes, I know I am the coach. I am the one people come to when they need to rise up and move forward, but I am also human. I also have so many things coming at me at once that sometimes I can’t even tread water.
So, what did I do? I let it all go, every single bit of it.
Tuesday, I put up my Christmas tree to bring me some joy and happiness and took a mental health day
Wednesday, our family celebrated Ty’s 13th birthday by taking him to a restaurant of his choice
Thursday, I gave myself permission to wallow and sit in my feelings and there were a lot of them
Friday, I ate comfort food and LOTS of sugar
Saturday, I spent getting my house back in order and making some adjusts to my plans for the rest of the year
Sunday, I worked on my goals for 2022 and focused on new opportunities
I told my husband like I tell my clients. Sometimes in life, our plate is cleared for us.
Whether it is wanted or unwanted:
Relationships ending
Financial difficulties
Loss of a loved one
Betrayal
So now the best thing we can do is take that empty plate and hit the buffet of life. This is our time to choose what we want on our plate and create the exact life we want and desire.
Sometimes in life, that challenge really is an opportunity, a complete do-over.
Once you let go of the strong emotions, make a definitive decision, you are well on your way.
Today I challenge you this: what do you need to let go of? Clear off your plate, so you can pick and choose from the buffet.
My first panic attack was in a restaurant. I had no idea what was happening to me other than my throat was closing shut, I couldn’t breathe and I needed to get out of there, NOW.
I was in college and my boyfriend was taking me to meet his parents. He was that “guy”. You know the one that you can’t believe is dating you because you aren’t even close to his level. We drove about 45 minutes to the restaurant and I was nervous. We walked in and went to find the table. Well, this was a HUGE table. Not only were his parents there, but his cousins, uncles, brothers, etc. This wasn’t just a meet my “parents” dinner.
I started sweating and not feeling well. I thought maybe I was getting sick or something. I kept going to the bathroom in hopes it would go away. Then I called my grandmother to try and figure what was happening. This was awful!! I wanted to be back in my dorm room NOW!!
This went on for what felt like years but wasn’t more than a couple of hours. I got a to-go box for my food because I sure could not eat. Finally, this was over and we were on our way home.
Unfortunately, it only got worse in the car. Instead of my boyfriend being compassionate and sympathetic to what was happening, I got chastised all the way back to the dorms.
How could I embarrass him like that? I left my food on the table and his parents paid for that. I was such an embarrassment.
Needless to say, that stuck with me for YEARS and YEARS. I was unable to eat out or in front of others well into my adult life. Panic attacks are no joke and they are super scary, but if you can pull out the root cause and clear it, they will disappear.
I am blessed to have learned how to handle my anxiety and panic attacks. In fact, to this day, they are almost non-existent. I found my root cause, did the emotional work, and persevered. I know what triggers them and avoid those foods and stimulants. There is a strong brain-gut connection with anxiety and panic attacks which I will be sharing in 2022.
Until then if you would like to discuss further or learn one of the tools that helps me please reach out.
I was in college and my boyfriend was taking me to meet his parents. He was that “guy”. You know the one that you can’t believe is dating you because you aren’t even close to his level. We drove about 45 minutes to the restaurant and I was nervous. We walked in and went to find the table. Well, this was a HUGE table. Not only were his parents there, but his cousins, uncles, brothers, etc. This wasn’t just a meet my “parents” dinner.
I started sweating and not feeling well. I thought maybe I was getting sick or something. I kept going to the bathroom in hopes it would go away. Then I called my grandmother to try and figure what was happening. This was awful!! I wanted to be back in my dorm room NOW!!
This went on for what felt like years but wasn’t more than a couple of hours. I got a to-go box for my food because I sure could not eat. Finally, this was over and we were on our way home.
Unfortunately, it only got worse in the car. Instead of my boyfriend being compassionate and sympathetic to what was happening, I got chastised all the way back to the dorms.
How could I embarrass him like that? I left my food on the table and his parents paid for that. I was such an embarrassment.
Needless to say, that stuck with me for YEARS and YEARS. I was unable to eat out or in front of others well into my adult life. Panic attacks are no joke and they are super scary, but if you can pull out the root cause and clear it, they will disappear.
I am blessed to have learned how to handle my anxiety and panic attacks. In fact, to this day, they are almost non-existent. I found my root cause, did the emotional work, and persevered. I know what triggers them and avoid those foods and stimulants. There is a strong brain-gut connection with anxiety and panic attacks which I will be sharing in 2022.
Until then if you would like to discuss further or learn one of the tools that helps me please reach out.
Inspiration is a curious thing. It’s been described as exalted and divine. It’s also part of ordinary life. It’s something that comes to you without any effort on your part. It’s also something that you can influence with your actions.
Dictionaries define inspiration as a kind of sudden mental stimulation. A brilliant idea pops into your head while you’re taking a shower. Something you see out a car window triggers thoughts for a new invention or a different career.
Learn more about how inspiration can brighten your life, along with strategies for enjoying more aha moments.
Benefits of Inspiration:
- Change your behavior. Research shows that adults who experience higher amounts of inspiration tend to have more compelling goals and make more progress in realizing them. It’s another reason to keep challenging yourself.
- Increase your engagement. Inspiration transforms your to-do list from things you have to do into things you want to do. Your life has more purpose.
- Enjoy greater happiness. Imagine being excited about Mondays and doing laundry. Inspiration wakes you up to the beauty of daily life.
How to Feel More Inspired:
- Build your self-esteem. Researchers have also examined personality traits associated with inspiration. A healthy self-image is essential. Accept and appreciate yourself for who you are.
- Think positive. Optimism helps too. Look on the bright side and focus on the things you can control. Take a break from TV news if it’s making you feel anxious.
- Cultivate gratitude. Being thankful is especially powerful. Keep a journal to remind you of your blessings. Let others know that they make a difference in your life.
- Be spontaneous. When was the last time you did something on the spur of the moment? Shake up your routines by packing a picnic lunch or building a fort with your kids.
- Honor your needs. You’re more likely to feel inspired when you work at staying fit. Eat a nutritious diet, exercise regularly and aim for 7 to 8 hours of sleep each night. Manage stress and take refreshing breaks before you feel fatigued.
- Observe role models. Enthusiasm is contagious. Surround yourself with friends and colleagues who feel passionate about what they do.
- Continue learning. Devote yourself to lifelong education. Read books and listen to podcasts about a wide range of subjects. Keep adding to your knowledge and skills.
- Try new things. Exploring unfamiliar territory helps you to overcome fears and think more flexibly. Substitute an exercise class for your usual bike ride. Volunteer at a local food bank or animal shelter.
- Make art. Block out time each day for creative activities. Work on your hobbies or start a new craft project. Visit art supply stores and read magazines for ideas.
- Practice patience. Dramatic flashes and profound insights can be few and far between. Remember that gradual developments can also pave the way to success.
- Take action. On the other hand, you may sometimes speed up the process by taking the first step while you’re waiting for inspiration to strike. If you’re low on energy, pick up a paintbrush or work in your garden for 10 minutes. You may find that you’ve built up enough momentum to want to continue.
- Limit competition. While there are many sources of inspiration in life, comparing yourself to others may backfire. Some studies show that less competitive personalities experience more inspiration. Enjoy your work and learn from experience, instead of worrying about impressing others.
Open up more possibilities in your life. Being inspired will help you to accomplish great things and have more fun along the way.
On a Saturday morning in November of 2019, my phone rang. It was my half-sister with whom I rarely communicated. I had a feeling things were about to get interesting. As soon as I said hello, she launched a verbal assault on me, screaming and yelling. This was nothing new, and it was one of the reasons we hadn't spoken in years. She is my 8-year-old younger sister. We share a mother but have different fathers. Due to her drug use and domestic violence issues with her husband, I decided to end my relationship with her (as did my mother and stepfather). I didn't want my children to be exposed to the toxicity in which she chose to live. She went on to say that our stepfather had crashed the car into his house. He was in the hospital, and I needed to get to Missouri right away.
I hung up the phone and called my stepbrother, who had been unaware of what had occurred, and explained that my half-sister was already there and that we needed to get there as soon as possible. We both agreed to leave the following morning.
We met at the hospital as soon as we arrived, and the discussions began. My stepfather was suffering from terminal brain cancer. We were told he only had about 6-8 weeks to live. He wanted us all to accompany him to his attorneys to go over his will and care plans for my mother. Due to years of prescription drug use, my mother was unable to care for herself. My stepfather and I had always planned that after his death, my mother would move to Oklahoma, where my half-sister and I both lived, had families and had careers. That way, she'd be close to both of us.
There had been numerous discussions with him and my mother prior to this. She would need to live somewhere she could be cared for so it would not disrupt my or my family’s life.
Everything changed at that conference table in the attorney's office. What on earth was going on? The will was being completely redone. My half-sister was moving to Missouri and living in their home to be my mother's primary caregiver. WAIT!!! This was not in the plan; this was not in the plan!!!
My stepbrother and I were stunned as we walked out of that office. I was befuddled, disoriented, and numb. I was completely removed from the will. Everything passed to my mother after my stepfather died, with the exception of the 1800-acre family farm, which went to my stepbrother. My half-sister would be granted power of attorney over my mother's medical decisions and financial affairs.
Back at home, I told my stepfather and mother about my concerns. My half-sister pursued me physically. WTH! She wanted me to fight her! This was like something out of a movie. At that point, I realized what was going on: manipulation and bullying at its finest. Someone saw dollar signs and was determined to ensure she received it all.
That day, I left and returned home. The following week, I called the attorney to express my dissatisfaction with what was going on. Of course, it didn't matter to him because I wasn't his client. I called my stepfather and expressed my concerns. I asked him if he understand the situation he was putting me in and what he was doing. "When can you move here?" he said to me. Really? Are you serious? I'm not going to move; I'm not going to be forced to move. This isn't how it works.
I was heartbroken. In January 2020, I attended my stepfather's funeral. Nobody said anything to me. It was as if I didn't exist in that family at all. There were no pictures of me or my children on the family picture board. There was no “I am so sorry for your loss.” I drove home from the funeral and sat in numbness for weeks.
How can the law allow such things to occur? How can a family allow such things to happen? My half-sister and mother never contacted me again. Then one morning in July of this year, I awoke to a FB message from my half-sister informing me that my mother had died, a FB message.
I started looking into things at this point. In May of this year, my half-sister sold my mother's estate and relocated to Oklahoma, WTH!!!!! That's what I wanted us to do originally. Of course, she purchased a nice half-million-dollar lake house for herself.
I began seeking legal counsel and am still waiting for many answers to this day. What happened to my mother? She was only 72 years old. What happened to all of the estate's contents that were sold? Was I a beneficiary of my mother's will? And the list goes on and on.
This weekend, it all came crashing down on me. So much rage and resentment. How could my parents abandon me in such a way? How could they have let this happen? What made my sibling such a jerk and bully?
Then, as the fog lifted and I processed my emotions, I remembered, Greed blinds people. Greed and envy have always blinded my half-sister. It's truly heartbreaking. I'm moving forward with the assurance that God will provide for what I've lost or what was supposed to be mine. It will simply come from a different source, and it will be even better.
Faith and love are stronger than greed and envy
I am hosting a webinar on October 28th at 6:30 pm CDT sharing the process I use to keep my emotions in check. You can register for it Here
